I have been terrible, I really have. Being back in the US, things didn’t feel right, I had a hard time focusing, frankly I had some depression issues. I still do right now, I spent all day yesterday in bed, save cooking, a little cleaning and a trip to the store to buy a few things to make a decent dinner. I did run my Italian hometown Half Marathon on Sunday. I love the shirt, and overall it was nice, but the turns, why they put so many turns in is beyond me. Looping around the city a few times, but never quite in the same place, over 20 turns in a half marathon. And they’re not avoiding hills or anything like that. Then I got out today and put in a pretty decent 7 miler. The only problem today, besides some soreness from Sunday, was a rock that got in my shoe and I had to stop to remove it.
But yeah, it was a rough Summer, and as of right now I have a hinky feeling about this work-year. I’m hoping it’s just the depression and it will pass, but I don’t know. I’m happy to be back and I’m excited to get to work, but my whole schedule seems to have changed, and I guess none of my students wanted me back, or whatever. That kind of hurts. It’s because I like stability sometimes. It seems like I don’t, but there is a certain part of me that really enjoys the same thing over and over and over again, it’s soothing. When it comes to certain aspects in life. Anyway, as I said, I hope it will pass and that it’s just part of the general malaise I am feeling.
Speaking of which, the whole time, as I said, I was in the US not just me but it seemed a little dimmer, a little more miserable, a little sadder, like a blanket of shame had come down to cover everything. It really did, I don’t know if people notice, but it’s a changed place and not for the better. The events of this week have made it that much worse. The fact that lawmakers will not do anything to stop the slaughter makes it even worse. Already people started with the “those guns were illegal to buy in the first place” and yes, he didn’t buy them. He bought the legal version, then bought the legal conversion accessories…anyway. Screw that. I have to push through this. I have to keep going. I’m not going to let all this mess break me.
Things to look forward to this year:
I have my motorcycle endorsement, so now I either need to find a cheap motorcycle to buy, or a place that will let me rent one cheap when I need one. So hopefully lots more adventures. New students, new challenges, new opportunities to grow and learn. Real internet coming soon to my apartment! And so much more.
I am going to do my best to keep myself updating regularly again. I make no excuse for my lack of attention, my dropping out. It was terrible of me and I should be ashamed of myself. But I will get there, and I will get it done. I have to keep putting in the work, it’s the least I can do, my lazy Summer is over.
Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!
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