Gil Can Run!A blog on Running and all the crap that runs through my head while doing it

Oct 5th Decisions decisions

So, here I am. I got my ass up and out today. I’m doing alright. Still a little so-so about somethings. Fucked up on my work schedule yesterday and ended up being late and I hate being late. I really pride myself on getting places on time and when I’m late, it really bothers me. Like deep down, causing existential crises, bother. Ennui! The run itself was good though, right around my average for 5 miles of training on the lungomare run. I can be happy about that given my ankles are still bothering me and now I have a little twinge in my left hamstring, but again run until/if it breaks.
So anyone who knows me probably realizes that I’ve never been happy working for other people. Not to say I don’t/haven’t enjoyed working for/with certain people. To the contrary, I’ve had plenty of people who have been a joy to work for, and there is a certain satisfaction in not having to worry about paychecks and taxes and shit like that. This is also not meant to intimate in any way that I’m not enjoying my current job, or that I don’t find it fulfilling. I get to help people learn and that’s huge. But as more time goes by, and the more I think about it, I really do need to really start making concrete commitments to try and break myself from this system which I know so desperately needs to be changed. But what can I do?
Well, first I think instead of just ranting out on this blog, I really need to discipline myself to really write things down. I think if I take my time and do more research, I could make a decent philosophical treatise and really try to figure out the best way forward for all of humanity. Because I think that may be the real problem here. With no fully integrated options to replace the existing status quo, even with a vast majority of the people recognizing something isn’t right, there is simply too much apprehension about moving past the current false dichotomies of “capitalism or communism” or “libertarianism or authoritarianism”, or any of the other nonsense we cloud our lives with. Whatever words we wish to use for our socio-political spectrum extremes. I’m not here to argue semantics and no, semantics is not the only argument.
The fact is, I’ve been saying for years someone has to come up with something comprehensive, and I am starting to wonder, why not me? I see parts here and there from different people. I see things and say, “This would be a good idea, but it doesn’t address that issue.” Maybe I should be the one to try and put it all together in a package that everyone can understand and get behind. At the very least, at least I would have tried.
More than that, if I can really get myself disciplined, perhaps I could try some fiction as well, but not be Randian about it. Not interject my philosophy and make a mess of things in the process, just write enjoyable stories. Possibilities. What’s the purpose though? To work for myself, so I can get everything together and really follow my dreams, follow the things which really bring me joy. Growing food, having a house to fix up. Yes, as much as I complain, I really enjoy the feeling of seeing some awesome work I did to fix a problem on my home. And cooking. I love cooking, I really do, I like it even better when someone enjoys the food I’ve prepared. I think giving someone else an enjoyable experience, particularly one as vital as food, is just about the most amazing thing you can do. In order to do these things, either the system needs to change where I can follow these dreams without worry of myself going hungry or homeless. Or I need to save the capital and get the investors in order to make these things a reality.
When I say, my dreams, I mean last night I literally had a dream I owned a restaurant/bar honestly. Plus, if I don’t open a bar/restaurant, who’s going to bring the bands I love to play in the place I love to live? Who wants to go to Milan to see Propagandhi or Bad Religion, All for Nothing, Sick of it All, Wisdom in Chains, The Descendents? To name a few. Plus, I can really cook some awesome food. But I realized I’d need to keep it simple here, folks don’t really seem to go too crazy with their pallets. That’s fine, I can do frittes and soups all day! Over the next couple weeks I really need to get my shit together and get moving on something, because in the end if you don’t even try all you can left with is regret. Even if you fail, as long as you’ve done your best you’ve done something.
Do I think I’ll change the world? Be some sort of hero? Nope, not at all. Just need to give things a try, don’t care what happens. I think I need to do these things. I like the person I am, I like most of the people I know (hahaha I’m not telling you who’s who!), I’m generally happy, and I know most of my unhappiness comes from other forces. But I ask myself what I am doing with my life and as much as I’m helping, I ask if there is more I can try to do. I also ask if there’s something which can bring me more happiness, and when I look at these things, the answer is yes, it’s possible. That doesn’t mean it will, it just means it’s worth exploring, it’s worth trying. If I can also help people on a broader scale at the same time, that’s a huge bonus.
In the end, the fiscal independence to really follow my heart is what I think I’m after. I think it’s what everyone is after. There should always be a way to do that, follow your heart. So that’s what I’ll look for and see where it takes me, and maybe I end up staying right as things are. But I have these dreams and they seem like good ideas, so I will take a look.

Have fun, keep running and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Oct 4th Back at it

I have been terrible, I really have. Being back in the US, things didn’t feel right, I had a hard time focusing, frankly I had some depression issues. I still do right now, I spent all day yesterday in bed, save cooking, a little cleaning and a trip to the store to buy a few things to make a decent dinner. I did run my Italian hometown Half Marathon on Sunday. I love the shirt, and overall it was nice, but the turns, why they put so many turns in is beyond me. Looping around the city a few times, but never quite in the same place, over 20 turns in a half marathon. And they’re not avoiding hills or anything like that. Then I got out today and put in a pretty decent 7 miler. The only problem today, besides some soreness from Sunday, was a rock that got in my shoe and I had to stop to remove it.
But yeah, it was a rough Summer, and as of right now I have a hinky feeling about this work-year. I’m hoping it’s just the depression and it will pass, but I don’t know. I’m happy to be back and I’m excited to get to work, but my whole schedule seems to have changed, and I guess none of my students wanted me back, or whatever. That kind of hurts. It’s because I like stability sometimes. It seems like I don’t, but there is a certain part of me that really enjoys the same thing over and over and over again, it’s soothing. When it comes to certain aspects in life. Anyway, as I said, I hope it will pass and that it’s just part of the general malaise I am feeling.
Speaking of which, the whole time, as I said, I was in the US not just me but it seemed a little dimmer, a little more miserable, a little sadder, like a blanket of shame had come down to cover everything. It really did, I don’t know if people notice, but it’s a changed place and not for the better. The events of this week have made it that much worse. The fact that lawmakers will not do anything to stop the slaughter makes it even worse. Already people started with the “those guns were illegal to buy in the first place” and yes, he didn’t buy them. He bought the legal version, then bought the legal conversion accessories…anyway. Screw that. I have to push through this. I have to keep going. I’m not going to let all this mess break me.
Things to look forward to this year:
I have my motorcycle endorsement, so now I either need to find a cheap motorcycle to buy, or a place that will let me rent one cheap when I need one. So hopefully lots more adventures. New students, new challenges, new opportunities to grow and learn. Real internet coming soon to my apartment! And so much more.
I am going to do my best to keep myself updating regularly again. I make no excuse for my lack of attention, my dropping out. It was terrible of me and I should be ashamed of myself. But I will get there, and I will get it done. I have to keep putting in the work, it’s the least I can do, my lazy Summer is over.

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Aug 15th Stop looking for a center here

OK, it’s been a while and I’ve been running, but I can’t focus on running right now. We all know what happened over the weekend and we know the piece of garbage occupying the Executive Branch has shit all over himself on it. Listen, there’s no “center” position here. You are either a racist, fascist, Nazi piece of garbage or you’re not. If you want to cape for these people, try and say, “They’re not all bad”, try and mitigate some of their positions as possibly being sensible in some light, you are one of them. And I will fight you.
This shit needs to stop, there’s no excuses anymore. “Well that’s how they were raised.” No, fuck that how long are we going to continue to ALLOW people to be raised this way? It’s been going on for generations and it never gets better and it never stops. I said it earlier, fascists, racists, etc. are easy to fight. But the people in the center, or searching for the center are the ones that keep it going. They turn escaped slaves in and send them back into bondage, because they don’t want to cause any waves, they don’t want to rock the boat. They want reconstruction to end and the freed peoples to not get reparations because the traitors of the confederacy are still our “countrymen”. They kept an apartheid regime in place because it was what the “people” voted for. They talk about how it is just for police to “fear for their lives” at a rate of 7:1 against POC, and that these murders are just because maybe those victims did something bad in their past. Now they sit there and tell me and all of us, that it’s both sides here, and it’s not. One side has always been about protecting the exploited, protecting and elevating the downtrodden, making the world a better and just place. The other side has been about murder and mayhem, slavery and exploiting peoples, and telling them they should be thankful for the opportunity. There is no comparison here.
Nazi Germany modeled their apartheid on ours. You don’t understand the link between the US and Nazis, you need to read. There is nothing that makes any of this acceptable. Anyone who wants to try and tell me that the people fighting against the models of what the Nazis did in Germany are the same, you have no clue what you’re talking about and you only prolong the pain and suffering of millions of people in this world. Shame on you.

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Aug 4th A new start, and immigration on the brain

OK, I took July off basically, from here. It’s been tough, I’ve been dealing with some depression, it’s really hard being here. But I have been running, I’m averaging 140 miles per month. Got a good run in today. I’m feeling alright, but the heat and humidity is still getting to me some days. Finally signed up for my motorcycle safety course to get my motorcycle endorsement when I renew my license. That’s something to look forward to. Still have to get my ticket back home at the end of the Summer, but that will work itself out.
Meanwhile, I’ve been seeing some pretty heavy anti-immigrant crap showing up. I’m not going to call anyone out, I’m not going to point fingers, well politicians will get mentioned probably. But the right wing seems to be reveling in showing naked, or partially nude Africans as some way of trying to make a point. I see these pictures as prurient and pointless. Trying to somehow shame them, or get other people angry over people bathing in fountains or some such. It’s shit. It’s absolute shit.
Listen, here’s the thing, politicians like Trump, Salvini, LePen, all these other fuckheads, they profit off the exploitation of people. I don’t care if a refugee has a cellphone or not, or if they’re begging outside a store, or bathing in a fountain. Someone, somewhere is profiting off of their situation. They are profiting from these people being exploited. Usually, they are the same politicians telling us to hate these people. They have no interest in anything other than keeping them in an unsure, and easily exploitable status. International trade deals create the situations they are escaping from in their home countries, and then they are exploited still when they leave. This is sick and disgusting, but these are the facts.
We know Trump has been caught exploiting undocumented workers. I’ve personally spoken to exploited workers in every country I have visited and lived in. Many times, these people are brought in legally for a brief period and when that status runs out their “employer” offers to keep them on, at a lower wage, for more hours, less protection, and making sure they get less and less as the worker now has no legal standing to do anything. But even the “unwanted” people who are out on the street begging for change. The politicians and that class exploit those people to reinforce their positions, garner more votes and more power, to keep the system working where they profit off the exploitation of others. It’s vicious.
This planet has more than enough for everyone’s need. Yet our choice to live in a system which creates deficit and scarcity causes this, and those people in power absolutely know this and they absolutely revel in turning the rest of us against the very least of us in order to continue to live off their misery, like a leech or a vulture. It sickens me when people fall into this. Usually, I’ll just tell people to their faces, but honestly I am an immigrant myself, I don’t even know how to approach it. It fills me with so much anger. Sure I’m not really an “immigrant” I’m a citizen, jure sanguinis, and I serve a very important function. But that doesn’t matter, I’m an immigrant, and I see all other immigrants as the same as me. They should all be given a chance, regardless of their status, and they should be protected and defended. Immigrants or not, all people are my brothers and sisters, I’ve said that before and I’ll keep saying it, and we all deserve basic dignity and respect, we should all be allowed to live free.
So, these images sicken me, the exploitation of people sickens me. Anytime, anyone in a position to help instead harms a vulnerable person it fills me with rage. When other people then use that harm to try and tell me or anyone else I should be angry about the exploited person, it fills me with an indescribable pain. I don’t have much of a vent for this. It’s all just so fucking insane, and people seem to just look past the obvious. It’s like no one ever can just land on the simplest explanation for things. They must complicate matters. When the fact is, always follow the money.
I’ve laid this out before, this isn’t some hypothesis, this is provable fact. People like Salvini and Trump, etc, simply want to keep the people they complain about in a position where they have no voice, so they can profit off them. They need a group to exploit for their interests, and they need to make sure these people can’t fight back. It’s weak, sure, but in the end it’s all about money for them. Well fuck them, and fuck their money. It’s criminal, it’s the true criminality in this world, instead of recognizing our common human brotherhood, we turn people against each other all in the name of profit.
What’s worse is, those who buy this shit and spread the hate and stupidity further, thinking it will aid them in some way. But they’re just helping these conmen and conwomen continue to exploit people, hurt people. The really fucked up part, they’re also exploiting those who support them. It’s garbage, I don’t care where someone was born, I don’t care who their parents were, what god they believe in if they even believe in one, or any of that shit. Everyone is welcome and everyone is my brother, everyone is my sister. I face this world with the knowledge that we are wasting our talent, everyone is wasting their talent. Everyone. I have the humility to say I don’t know, I have the humility to say other people may have a better idea. But dammit, I know we aren’t supposed to be doing this shit. I know we’re not supposed to be fucking each other over, I know we’re not supposed to make misery in order to collect imaginary bank notes. I know we’re not supposed to destroy our fellow creatures, human and otherwise, destroy our planet in the pursuit of economy.
So if you’re falling into this shit, expand your mind, look to what is really happening, and throw out the bullshit. I’m just out of patience with that. The more I run, the more my consciousness expands, the more I see this shit as flat out wrong, the clearer my thoughts become on this. So listen, if you’re hung up on this immigration shit, if you’re hung up on language shit, if you’re sharing pictures of half-naked immigrants, just fucking stop. If your answer to whatever perceived threat to you isn’t based in the idea even someone trying to directly harm you is your brother or sister, then you need to just stop.

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Jul 23rd Where I’ve been

No excuses, just a reason. I have been keeping up my running, but I’ve been in a weird place. I have said before that every interaction you have in life builds up who you are. Some are good, some are bad, most have barely any effect at all. But there are some people, parents, maybe a teacher, grandparents, aunts, uncles, neighbors who can have a profound impact on you.
I did not have a lot of friends as a kid. Of the few friends I did have there was one house where no matter what was going on I was always welcome. My friend’s mom was always greeting everyone with a smile, she’d even play video games with us, or just talk to us. She was an educator and a historian. Even though she had her work, and research, and societies which she belonged to, she made time for the kids, all of us. After a very sudden illness she died the other day and I’ve been dealing with all this. Trying to be there for my friend and his family the best I can, and trying to process my feelings from my end.
My parents gave me so much of my care and drive to help people, to raise everyone up, to make sure every human being is treated with dignity and respect regardless of where they were born, who their parents were, what god they pray to, who they love, where they work, if they work, whatever. Valerie taught me a different side of this though. She knew her story, she knew where she came from and she taught us. She showed us the shackles they brought her ancestors to the New World in. She discussed the racism, apartheid, she shared with us her personal stories about her experiences even in “liberal, enlightened Connecticut.” She was not shy, she was not ashamed. As I sat and listened, I could feel the hurt and the anger, but she never showed it. Even if I didn’t realize it then, she taught me how to listen to other people’s stories and not just take in the words, but to truly take in all of what was said. But it also taught me that no matter what I thought of where society was, or is, I need to listen to other people and accept their experiences, and that I am not the final judge or arbiter of where society stands.
What is amazing is, she didn’t just stop at her family and friends. She reached out to the community at large and taught people about all these things. Fully engaged in teaching New Haven about its own history. Through the Greater New Haven African American Historical Society and Ethnic Heritage Center. They did tours through New Haven of very important sites, even finding a secret room in a house in New Haven that most likely was used as a stop on the Underground Railroad. Her and her fellow historians brought these lessons out into the community and made New Haven a better place.
More than that, those talks also gave me an appreciation for education in general. She wasn’t the only person to tell me the virtues of good education. Not just in a school, just taking the time to learn for yourself, to pursue your own interests in subjects. I definitely would not be an English teacher today without her. I would not have had such in interest in archaeology and history by far. I definitely would not have the perspective on it all that I have today.
I’m glad I got the chance to hang out with the family during Christmas, I feel bad I didn’t stop right in when I got back here this Summer. Loss is hard to deal with. I’m always left wondering if I’ve done enough to live up to what people have given to me. I know so many people have said they just wish me to be happy and healthy, but I feel if people are giving me such wonderful lessons about life and giving me fun, happy, safe places to learn and grow then I really do feel like I owe it to them to do more. I know I can’t help disappointing people at some point, life is full of highs and lows, of successes and failures. I just hope I succeed more than I fail and that all the people who helped get me there are happy they helped me reach that point, and that they feel the time, care, knowledge they used on me was worth it.
That seems like a lot of pressure to put on oneself, put that’s always been the pressure I’ve felt. I am my worst critic by far. Always hoping I did enough, always looking to do better. It can be difficult sometimes, but I wouldn’t want to be any other way. I wouldn’t want to be complacent with myself. First, I’d be a jerk. Second, I think that would be horribly boring. I don’t want to be better so I can walk around talking about how great I am. If I want to raise everyone else up, I have to be strong enough to lift. I have to be kind and compassionate enough to extend that help to all who ask for it. I have to be humble enough to excuse myself when someone doesn’t want that help. Every day, as I say, work to be better than I was the day before. The only competition I’m interested in, against myself.
Not to get too sad, but I’d be remiss at this point if I didn’t mention I actually had two wakes at the same time happening. It was very difficult to miss one, but my cousin was there to pass along my condolences. I have limits and sometimes I don’t want to push them. Let’s go out and do the best we can every day. Also, let’s take the lessons we learn and pass them on, it’s the best way to honor the people who gave us those lessons, it’s the way to keep their memory going.

Have fun, keep running and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Jul 6th Looking up, kind of

Alright, it was the ‘Murica Day holiday on Tuesday, so I didn’t run. Made it to the club run last night which was fun. Got to talk to a new member (sort of) and have fun until I had to run off to get my dad’s car dropped off for some work it needed. The club run did not record on my Garmin for some reason. But today’s run did. My headphones broke this morning, so I had no music and then it was raining on me. So I kind of lost my focus toward the end. Oh well. However, upon returning to my house I had a message from my sister that a large retailer was hiring in my town, so I applied. I have an interview on Tuesday, so we’ll see what happens.
If I can get enough hours and do the things I want to do this will work out well. I know sacrifices will have to be made unfortunately. I did run out and get new headphones too, so I’ll give those a go. I went back to JVC, but bluetooth, the product line has worked well for me in the past, and hopefully these will continue that tradition. Still haven’t been paid for the extra contract I took on at the end of the school year, pretty angry about that. But I will remain patient.
I found myself re-examining my philosophy on freedom, and where it comes from. Because one of the people I was talking with on the club run had an extensive military history, and we ended up talking a little bit about that stuff. I keep returning to the same conclusion though. No matter what the government is, no matter what the rules are, you are only as free as you allow yourself to be. Yes, there may be consequences for your freedom, but that’s just the way it is. I don’t require a government to “protect” my freedoms, I only require my own courage. No government, military, piece of paper, nothing gives any human being freedom save their own willingness to face any consequences. Not that things should always have negative consequences.
That is a different argument though, what should and shouldn’t be allowed to be done without consequence. Governments shouldn’t be in the business of deciding who lives or dies, that’s for certain. Yet still, it’s up to the people to demand justice. Any government not deriving its power from the consent of the people is illegitimate. But who is to say who should be removed by force. If the people refuse to capitulate to the illegitimate government’s demands they will be forced to stop. The problem is too many people are too obedient. Why there aren’t mass protests shutting shit down everywhere at this point amazes me.
Look at all the political arguments across the globe, they’re all the same. How is it possible all governments in the world aren’t doing a damned thing to stop the problems causing so many people to flee their homes and look for safe haven elsewhere, yet at the same time refuse to let in “too many” refugees? How is that possible? How is it possible the economy runs off of exploiting workers all over the world, and yet all governments are refusing to protect their workers from being exploited? Some are working hard to destroy the safeguards won by generations past, others are setting up rules to ensure those safeguards can never be put in place.
So many people are complicit in this system, if they just were to stop force everything to grind to a halt, force their voices to be heard it would all end. Yes, some governments would respond with violence, some people would die. It wouldn’t be all sunshine and lollipops, but it would work. It needs to work. If you look through history it does work. In fact, it is the only thing which ever has. We think of the “Founding Fathers” (for all their major flaws) as “Americans” but they weren’t. They were British. They were citizens of the crown, it was an internal conflict. History is filled with peasant revolts, general strikes, specific strikes, slow-downs, demonstrations, this is how the people have forced the oligarchs to allow them freedom of whatever those people were fighting for. But it’s always followed by the oligarchs finding a way to keep control, either by proxy or directly.
You want to fight for freedom? Go on strike, organize with your coworkers, your neighbors, demand more. There’s no outside force trying to take anything from you, it is all internal. I know what people think, “but what about this country doing this, or that one doing that?” No oligarch anywhere could have ever done anything without the obedience, the capitulation of their population. If you cow the people into not resisting you, then you can do these things. Worse, if you get people to believe that acting externally and punishing other peoples can enrich their lives, you can commit some of the worst crimes humanity is aware of. Refuse to participate, militarily, economically, socially. I don’t watch reality shows, I don’t follow trends, I don’t give a crap about the latest “Rah Rah the world is awesome” music. I decide to fight, in my own small way, every day. Stop participating, stop allowing this to happen.

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Jul 2nd We hold these truths

So yesterday was my running club’s annual 4th of July race, they decided to do it on the weekend, instead of the actual 4th as they traditionally did. We show up early and run the course as a club before, well some of us do. So I went and did that and had a great day catching up with as many friends as I could. Even met some new friends which was totally cool. Then I waited until the Sun was low in the sky before running today, and still struggled because the air quality was horrible. As tough as it is in Italy sometimes, it seems like my lungs burn much worse here.
So I’ve mentioned before I run by the Amistad Memorial when I run past City Hall in New Haven. People have been posting all their ‘Murica posts, and whatnot and as I passed by today it bothered me. I love that there was justice in New Haven on this particular case. But the whole thing should have never happened. I’ve talked about this in pieces before. The founders of this nation wrote a document we celebrate every July 4th and it claimed “all men are created equal”, and yet they owned slaves and claimed that those men weren’t equal. They didn’t treat women equal, and well generally if you weren’t rich and European and a man, you were screwed.
In one breath they’re talking about freedom and equality and on the other hand they codified slavery, the idea that those slaves weren’t people (3/5ths look it up). They weren’t interested in freedom or equality (ok, a very few of them did argue for abolition then but clearly not enough). They weren’t great minds, they weren’t “enlightened”, they were just shitty rich guys screwing over whomever they could. They didn’t want soldiers in their homes, fine. They wanted a say in legislation that effected them, whatever. They turned around and they kept other people as property. They made that part of the law, that you were allowed to keep other humans beings, buy, sell, trade, treat them as property.
All these years later, there’s never been a proper apology and there’s never been recompense to the descendants of those unjustly held. They were promised a payment, and it was never made. Then we have so many people running around saying that the descendants of slaves; who never had any inheritance, had their history, culture, and identities ripped from them, their parents, grandparents, great-grandparents had their husbands, wives, children ripped from them and sold off or worse, are somehow to blame for not having these things. After being “set free” they were still treated as less than. Driven away from the voting booths, denied education, basic services, jobs, any sense of equal treatment. Their lives were forfeit at the drop of a hat, just because of an accusation. Still to this day, when police and even citizens murder them in cold blood they merely have to say they “felt threatened” and they are let go.
At no point has this nation dealt with this. At no point, even after a war over slavery, have we ever rectified this situation. We continue on, and people that have benefited directly or indirectly from this system continue to profit and those who have been victimized continue to be victimized, and if you talk about it you’re “divisive”. No, I’m not. I’m trying to bring about real unity. Unity isn’t achieved through everyone ignoring the past and blaming the poor for being poor, and blaming the victims for being victims, and claiming “the past is the past”. Unity is found through accepting the damage that has been done and putting an end to injustice. Truly putting an end to it. That won’t happen until we literally destroy the system which created the past. If you keep the system, there will always be inequity, and the many will always force the few to suffer. They will justify it however they want, and that is true across the board.
So I’m not too much into celebrating, never really have been. It needs to end, it is evident with the idiot we have posing as a head of state right now. His video tweet this morning was another completely indecent display of jackassery. But it is a glimpse into the buffoonery which has weaved it way through the history of this country, and much of the world. This is what we have sewn. We should have thousands of statues and memorials around the country to all the slave revolts, all labor strikes, all the times the real people, the exploited, the hunted, the disenfranchised tried valiantly to fight back, to gain ground. We don’t, there are controversies over removing statues and monuments to the people who fought to oppress! We elect the people who want so badly to uphold the injustice to office, and cheer their speeches full of hate and bigotry.
So no, I’m not celebrating, sure I’ll go see my family and I’ll celebrate them. But this shit needs to change, and yesterday.

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Jul 1st Half a year done

We’re midway through 2017. Let’s hope overall the second half is better than this joke of a first half with these idiots running things. Although we beat a fascist in France, and dealt a big blow to the near-fascist neo-cons in the UK. Meanwhile, on the running front, I’m just about at where I want to be for the year, I think 3 miles short overall. If I keep up my current distance I’ll go over 1600 miles (2575 km). My heel is getting better, my knee is still a little tweaked, but overall, halfway there, I feel pretty good. But my speed is not there right now, of course, injury right? I mean that’s the way it goes.
So I did run yesterday and Wednesday. Yesterday’s run was actually pretty good, but I am tired. I have done lots of miles over the last two weeks, so there’s so fatigue there. I’m also not doing well given that things are slow here. No one needs any help and the couple places that have, not interested in someone leaving at the end of September. That’s getting me down a little bit. It is tough here, I actually forgot how it all makes me feel. Unless I had a very compelling reason, I don’t think I could come back here full time. My friends and family are great and all, but it just isn’t the same.
The political situation doesn’t help matters for sure. The Traffic Cone Con said some really nasty things about a morning news show host yesterday, and it was unreal. I mean the baseless idiocy, the cruelty of these tweets was way beneath the dignity of the office he occupies (I feel illegally). I can be pretty mean to people sometimes, but this was so awful. He’s like a child who never got disciplined. He’s the most spoiled known human being in existence, no sense of propriety or decency. I’ve always known this, this is not a shock to me, it’s so disgusting to see people defend it or attempt to. It’s disgusting to see it being referred to as “leadership.” I have so many problems with modern “First World” nations and their policies in general. I don’t agree with any party, philosophically, ethically, I’m closest to the Greens. But the Greens (at least in the US) do nothing to actually build a movement and take over a system which needs to be changed. It seems like angry rich people just buying losing presidential bids. No attempt at local organization, you never see Green Party candidates for Board of Education or Town Council.
Well, the higher inequality goes the closer we get to violent revolution. That’s just what you see as you look through history. So I suppose there’s that. But I think that’s a fairly long way off at this point. So we will see and try to be patient.
All I know is I’ve been in the US for two weeks and I’m stressed out.

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!

Jun 27th Line up together

The title will make sense later. I’ve been neglectful, lazy even! Trying to find something part time for the Summer still. Hey if anyone knows of anywhere that needs someone for the Summer, let me know! haha. Thursday’s run went well, Saturday I ended up not running due to rain and other issues, Sunday I got 15 in, but it was slow and tough. Yesterday I did some catch-up miles, and today I actually had the best run out of all of them. I couldn’t run in the mud on the trail around East Rock, it did rain pretty hard early this morning. Which made for a cool run, althought it was humid as the Sun was burning off the water. But I’ve been taking it easy the last few weeks and will continue to do so until I heal properly.
So I make no secret that I’m a rugby fan. I used to play and for an American, I’m actually not so bad at it. But just like football (not American Football, actual football) I don’t support the US team. Firstly, I’m not really American now am I? I’ve already had people on the internet complain when they disagree with me that I’m not “really” American anymore because I don’t always live in America. Because if you don’t have a real argument, just attack where your opponent lives. But anyway, when it comes to “The Beautiful Game” I’m an Italy supporter, but for Rugby we’re talking New Zealand. Not because they’re great, although they are, but because they clearly work hard and their skills are amazing.
Now, there are always problems with sport, they can be used to distract people. It’s usually too expensive for the average fan. Then there’s the whole issue of putting people on pedestals, protecting them from punishments for poor behavior due to their status in society, etc. But the fact is The All Blacks, at least seem, to bring the country together, and it’s a priority to them. I don’t live there, I only can go on what I see. I think it is due to the fact that a large percentage of the team is Maori, as opposed to the general population. Again, Europeans trying to wipe everyone out. Certainly on that front you can check out “Once Were Warriors” which is a movie which delves into. But they do try to get the country together and their latest effort is fantastic.
I think this one should be used by the whole world honestly. It’s a folk song from the 50s, in Maori. The lyrics are pretty simple:

Tūtira mai ngā iwi,
tātou tātou e
Tūtira mai ngā iwi,
tātou tātou e
Whai-a te marama-tanga,
me te aroha – e ngā iwi!
Ki-a ko tapa tahi,
Ki-a ko-tahi rā
Tātou tātou e
Tā-tou tā-tou e E!!
Hi aue hei !!!

Line up together people
All of us, all of us
Stand in rows people
All of us, all of us
Seek after knowledge
and love of others – everyone
Think as one
Act as one
All of us, all of us
All of us, All of us!!
Hi aue hei !!! (best I can figure not knowing Maori, this is kind of like “Yell it from the mountaintop”)

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run so can you!

Jun 21st Putting in some work today

The run went pretty well. I had some good conditions, cloud cover, low humidity (relative to what it has been), good temperature. I was able to keep a decent pace through most of the run. Seeing as I was short of where I wanted to be on miles today, I took a turn that sent me up a decent hill at the end, and that’s where I lost steam. It’s ok, I’m still breaking in the new pair, my ankle is still healing, so all in all I’m very pleased.
Got back to the family home, washed up, ate a good lunch and then picked up my 16 year-old niece to take her driving. She needs lots of practice. I was fortunate growing up, my paternal grandfather was a truck driver and that he was retired before I was born, when we’d visit on Summer vacations he would set up obstacle courses for me to tackle on his tractor. My father was always teaching me about driving, my sister too. We learned from a very young age, and we got practice too. Given how tiny I was as a child, my grandfather even had blocks I could tie to my shoes so I could reach the pedals on the tractor. I always realized I got a special experience there and it paid off, I passed my driving exam without an error on the first try. I’ve always felt confident behind the wheel and have skills many other drivers do not.
The rest of my family, I believe, takes this experience for granted. My niece did not have this experience. She needs practice, she needs instruction, she needs help. But most of all, she needs patience. It’s not always easy and of course you don’t want 2000 lbs of metal and plastic going out of control, and you certainly don’t want a few thousand dollars of car crashing into things. But today was good, a little stressful for me, and I’m very tired but good. Given that it was her first lesson with me, she did well. I’ve certainly had worse lessons with people in the past.
I think in general, apart from lacking humility, many people lack true patience. I have to say I did lose my patience with her when she drove up on a curb as a bus was coming down the lane in the parking lot we were in. Yes, I started her in an empty parking lot. I did lose my patience, I felt bad but she also understood. But she made other mistakes, even if I thought they were silly or due to being inattentive, I stayed patient. How else can someone learn if you’re always jumping on them for the slightest infraction. So I took it easy and just calmly explained what needed to be done. She will learn in time.
Patience, humility, these are virtues we should always look for in life. If people aren’t showing them, we should probably steer clear. It doesn’t matter the situation, except one. Ha, of course I’m going to give myself an exemption! Seriously though. when it comes to climate change, we don’t have time for patience, when it comes to direct threats to survival, when you know what needs to be done, you just have to put the plan into action. I think when it comes to survival, particularly of the biodiversity of the planet, then yes patience needs to be foregone.
Other than that, in life, equal parts humility and patience are needed. In teaching, in caring, in politics, in science, in art, in every single thing we do. This is the key, this is how we learn to excel. This is how we become the best we can be, and it’s how we bring out the best in those around us. I lack patience sometimes I know, even beyond the instance I’ve excused myself from. My exception there does cover fascists and racists, because they have often exhibited their desire to kill, so survival is an issue there. But with some other forms of ignorance I am less patient than I should be. When people are just plain ignorant, or draw false conclusions, I get too upset sometimes. I need to work on that. But as I always say, our only real job in life is to be a better person than the person we were yesterday.

Have fun, keep running, and remember; if Gil can run then so can you!